Don't be a dick.

So for the last couple days I trimmed one set off the jump ropes and did some extra sets of arms or abs instead of floor jumps in order to take it easy on my knees. I am pleased to report that they seem to be back to full strength again. No more pain when I ride my bike up hill to work or do my jumps.

Also, some further thoughts on my birthday. I actually wasn't all that upset about not doing much. Honestly, I think that it was another case of confronting societal programming, which is exactly what we've been doing this whole time on the PCP. In this case, the only thing that was bringing me down was the fact that society expects me to go nuts on my birthday. Why? What makes that day any different that going out and getting wasted or pigging out doesn't have the same ill effects it has the rest of the year. I felt bad that I couldn't go out on the town and have 2 or 3 or 20 beers because society expected me to do those things. But the truth was, despite the encouragement of my fellows to cheat on "just this one day" I really didn't want to cheat. I wanted to continue to eat well, and do my work out.

So I went and had some sushi, which is a special treat but still (mostly) PCP safe. Then I went and saw a movie with a friend of mine. That was enough. It would have been nice to see my family members, but they'll still be around on other days. It shouldn't have to be some arbitrary "special" day in order for us to get together. So really, when I focus on what I am actually feeling and not what I'm supposed to feel, it was a good day and I did exactly what I wanted.

And now, a brief rant:

So the other day I was at work and a customer came in with a pair of headphones that had stopped working. He'd had them for about 7 weeks. Now, our return policy is 15 days. It seems short I know, but in order for us (being a small local business) to not just eat the cost of the product, we need that time to be able to return it to the manufacturer and get a new one or get a credit back. So we simply can't take things back beyond that and not loose money. Our return policy is also plastered everywhere. On the counter, on the receipt, on signs, on our website. Everywhere.

Now these headphones were still covered by the manufacturer warranty, as noted on our website. So I told the customer that we couldn't take them back, but I would look up the warranty information and contact info for him. Now, the page for the company took forever to load on the computer. So the customer was left staring at me who was left staring at the screen. This is where he started getting rude. He pulled the "my company spends x thousands of dollars here" card. He basically threatened to not give us a future sale over this pair of headphones. He even tried to point out how paltry $30 was compared to the money he would spend. Here's the thing though, if it's so paltry, why is he so upset to lose $30. We are not a large company. As much as losing that money hurts him, it hurts us too.

My real point though is the fact that he was intentionally trying to make me feel like the asshole. What pisses me off is that I see this all the time, and I know that it is mostly just show. The people aren't really that upset over random product (most of the time). But they know, that in our American culture, the customer does not have to take responsibility for anything, and that if they make a big enough stink they'll get what they want. So they don't think twice about the fact that I am a real person they are pushing around, and that their behavior really isn't anything short of abuse.

I'm pretty sure that most, if not all, well meaning religions started with the same principle: Don't be a dick. That's it, nothing fancy. It's when you start adding caveats and special cases and such that it gets all fowled up and lost. But "don't be a dick" is how I try to live. And it occured to me, after dealing with this customer, that there is a simple way to find out if you are living to this standard. When you get home at the end of the day and just think for a second about your interactions with other people. Now, ask yourself "how many people did I make feel like shit for no good reason?" If your answer is anything but 0, you are a dick.

Honestly, I'm ok with it if you are. Just don't lie to yourself and tell yourself you are a good person if you were able to answer this question with a number. In every situation, there is a skillful way to deal with even frustrating situations and still treat the other party with respect and empathy. Try to find that way.

Just don't be a dick.