PCP props

True quote from the sales person at Olympia Sports when I went to replace my broken jump rope:

"I've never heard of anyone wearing through a jump rope that fast!"

Yeah, I felt like a badass.

One Final Thought

Similarly to Peace Corps, I hear a lot of people talk about how much the PCP has changed them, or that they are a different person. I have done this myself. But I am reminded of something one of my best friends told me when she came to visit me in Niger. I had been in West Africa for about a year and a half at this point and I asked her if she could describe how I had changed since leaving the US. What she said after a few moments thought was this:

"You're different, but not really. If anything you seem more like yourself."

This was a girl who knew me probably better than I knew myself at the time and I think she was right. Peace Corps didn't make me a different person, but brought out parts of myself that I hadn't manifested before. Likewise, I was starting to be more fitness minded before the PCP, but now that healthy person that was buried down under years of Western conditioning is able to stand before you in full fit glory. I feel like I better exemplify my own internal image of myself. That is how PCP has changed me. It has made me into myself.

Thank you Patrick and Chen for creating such a wonderful project and thank you for helping us all to be ourselves.

Ok I'm done now I swear :-P

The end...or the beginning?

I've been trying to figure out how best to explain the after effects of the PCP. It's been a long and challenging road, though after the fact, it doesn't seem like it was that much. Standing on the other side, all the challenge portrayed in any of our blogs seems pretty small really. So, now that I am done, what has actually changed, and what has stayed the same.

My weight has not changed much. My weight before the project was 137lbs or 62.6Kg. After the project my weight is now about 143lbs or 64.9Kg. So not a whole lot of change there. What this tells me is that I was already pretty close to my ideal weight, though my body consistency has changed quite a bit. Actually, I've been pretty much in this weight range since high school. As Patrick has told us, we should fluctuate by about 5 lbs or so without much effort or concern.

Speaking of body make up, my muscles are much more clearly defined and there's definite areas that have bulked up such as my shoulders and arms. Patrick told me the other day that I look just like The Crow. It's funny, when I was a dorky little kid watching that movie in middle school (admiring Brandon Lee's body even then) I was pretty much convinced I would never look like that. Ever. Now, I feel like I look like a bad ass.

The most significant changes though, and what I appreciate the most, are the mental ones. I've been more or less eating like I used to the last couple of days, just to see how it feels. Honestly, after most meals or snacks I still feel hungry. Not like I'm not full, but hungry like I haven't actually eaten. I finish my meal but I still crave some fresh veggies or a couple of eggs. The processed food just doesn't satisfy.

I'm also starting to feel decidedly antsy not working out. I suspect that I'll end up jumping rope again tomorrow. I'm not avoiding exercise, I'm just seeing how it feels to go without again. Man, it's like an itch. It's ignorable right now, but I suspect by tomorrow or the next day it'll be unbearable. Like the longer I try to ignore it the worse it gets.

Things that are not the way they used to be:

I have a small bag of cookies sitting on my shelf, I haven't touched one since I ate just one. I was taking a 10 minute break from my studies, so I did 20 pushups. I was hungry for a late night snack the other day, so I ate a whole tomato.

Things that I'm excited to have back to the way they were:

Peanut butter.

Beans.

Humus.

Mocha.

Beer.

Things I could care less about having back:

Buffalo wings.

Baked sugary goods.

Getting Drunk.

Fried foods.

I feel like this way of seeing food was within me the whole time. My body knew what it really wanted. But our society presents us with so much temptation before we have erected the proper defense that my body doesn't stand a chance. I am so glad I found this project and Patrick and am immensely grateful to him for helping me to break that conditioning.

To all those that have offered encouragement during this project: Thank you so much. To those who tried to tempt me time and again: thank you for helping me without realizing it. To those who have been interested in the PCP: Do it if you feel up to it. It is one of the best things you will do. I hope this blog has and will serve as encouragement to change your own habits for the better.

And to my team mates. You guys kick ass. I could not have gotten through this if I didn't know that you were slogging it out down here with me. Seeing you struggle or triumph gave me the energy every day to press on, when on my own I would have let myself down. We can do anything we set our minds to and we know it. Most people never figure this out, never push themselves and never push past their limits. You all should be very proud.

Like Peace Corps before it, this has been one of those life altering experiences I will not forget, and will forever be changed by.

Thank you.

Surprising thoughts at the end.

So, while I myself have had nothing planned for this moment, it happens to coincided with a friends birthday. So I will be going to partake of tasty beverages and some probably unhealthy snacks. Also, it will be a party like the ones I haven't been to since pre PCP.

Here's the thing I've noticed. In anticipating this evening's festivities, a thought has entered my mind a few times that goes, literally: "I'm going to go to a bar and pay money to ingest poison, too much of which, will make me hate tomorrow. Man that seems dumb and no fun." This surprised me and is not at all how I used to think of alcohol. My mouth is still watering at the thought of a beer or a glass of bourbon, but the thought of being drunk is maybe the least appetizing thing imaginable right now.

Should be fun to see how the evening goes.

Day 90 The Magic - Part Three: Peak Condition Magic

Well, here I am. Day 90 is in the bag. I have a lot that I want to reflect on and I don't expect to get it all out now. I think I'd like my day 90 post to be the 3rd part of my discussion on Magic, because it really ties it all together. But first a run down of today.

I went and did day one's workout. Took me under 10 minutes. That said, while they were easy, I did almost sort of start to get a burn on most of the exercises. See, since they were so easy, I found I was actually able to really focus on my form and isolate the muscles with incredible accuracy. The result being that these exercises, while easy and not really "work" still felt really good and fluid. Kind of like going back and playing a really easy song on guitar after you've challenged yourself for months. You find yourself adding little flourishes and being exceptionally fluid just because, well, you can now. It was still amazingly clear that I've come a long way since Day 1.

Now on with the Magic post.

I've talked about competitive vs casual players and how they perceive the game differently. What pushes competitive players to get better is drive. They have to want it. They have to be willing to put in the effort to get there. This is what makes them want to improve. But to actually improve they need confidence, but they also need humility.

First, confidence means they have already seen themselves victorious in their mind. They've seen how to get there. So, deep down, they know that they can be great. This is a great start. But to carry it further you also need to be humble. Just as strongly as they know they will be a great player, they also have to know that they are not there yet. At this point I should be clear. By great, I mean perfect. To really succeed you have to seek perfection. You have to seek Peak Condition.

This means acknowledging your mistakes. The sign of a driven player: they get upset when they loose. The hallmark of a player that will go far: when they loose they want to know why. Too many players blame their losses on luck, mana screw, or their opponent having better cards. As I've said before, these elements are there, but not as much as people want to believe. Most of the time, if you stop and look, you can find plays that you could have done differently to change the outcome of the game. That is what great players do. They own their mistakes, they don't make excuses, and they try to improve. They put in the work and the focus.

This sound familiar? What has Patrick always ranted about with people and health? They make excuses: no time, too much work, gyms are expensive, etc. PCPers, like great magic players, accept that we are not in Peak Condition, yet. But we have seen ourselves getting there, and we put in the effort. We looked not at how life had placed fitness beyond our reach, but rather what we could do differently. How can I eat better? How can I burn more calories and build muscle? What are my priorities? When the answer to the last question becomes physical fitness, then you are started down the right track. You just have to focus.

That is the last thing I want to talk about here. Focus. It's something I've been seeing pop up a lot lately. It is certainly an important part of PCP. The things we give up from our past lives attest to that. But for the last year or so it has been popping up in Magic theory a lot.

There are many elements to Magic: The Gathering game theory (card advantage, tempo, etc). They are all focused on ways to mechanically improve your game play. How to find the correct play in every circumstance. Many of the gurus seem to think that this part of theory has been pretty much figured out, and now it's down to arguing minute cases. However, many of these same gurus have lately been dropping focus into their articles. They emphasize the idea that if you are in the right mental state, the plays will come. Specifically Zac Hill has put it best: Focus on what matters right now.

This summer, with my efforts both in Magic and PCP have taught me the value of focus, and how it is always within my power to improve. You know what, it's all worked. I'm in the best shape of my life, and I really feel that my Magic playing is approaching the most competitive it's ever been. I came in the top 3 of my last two tournaments, just local ones, but 25 players each time. When you decide to make something your priority, and focus focus focus on it, then you really can exact phenomenal change in a short while. Take responsibility for your own success.

Day 89... why does this feel so familiar?

So I'm spending the last couple of days of the Project up here in the woods of Northern Vermont. I'm really glad I came up here as I needed the dose of tranquility. I spent the afternoon walking around some beaver ponds and an old abandoned farm that I used to take kids up to in my days as a camp counselor. It was a welcome chance to try and still my mind from all the chaos of the last few months.

Life certainly has a way of keeping us busy if we let it. This summer I've been focused on the PCP and on my Magic playing. As the PCP has been winding down I've found myself wondering what I'm going to do now that I'm not on this fixed routine. Well, the answer came yesterday morning. I got a call saying I've been accepted to a graduate program at Champlain College. I start working towards my Masters of Science in Mediation on Monday. It'll be a shift from developing my body to developing my mind, and I'm psyched!

The workout today was a beating. But it was the best beating of my life. I really gave it my all, and I'm glad I did seeing as my workout tomorrow promises to be a peace of cake. Should be invigorating to see how far I've come. More than anything though. I'm nervous. It's kind of frightening to be standing here on the edge of completion (I know my name says complete on the PCP website, but that's only in Patrick Time so far) and knowing that after this point it's all on my own will power. I'll have no Patrick pushing my limits and no team mates encouraging and supporting me.

Oddly, the way I feel right now is all to familiar to me. It's almost exactly the way I felt about the end of my Peace Corps service. Excited for change, yet sad for such an influential time to end. And again, I find that I've once more engaged in an adventure that has distanced me from those I knew before. This time my world view hasn't changed so much, but my perception of fitness and food has radically transformed. I know that tomorrow night I can go out and go nuts on the town but honestly, I don't really want to. I mean, I'll probably have a beer (or maybe a glass of scotch...mmmm scotch) and maybe a sandwich or something at the pub, but get wasted? Pig out on cakes and deserts? No thanks.

Now I just need find globally conscious and fitness minded people to hang out with so I don't go nuts.

I should be in bed now.

I have a lot I want to write about actually, but for some reason this week has decided to be as busy as the first week. Why is it that arguably two of the most important weeks of the project had to become super hectic?

Now that I've gotten used to the new super cushy running shoes for jump ropes, I have to say, get yourself a pair. I was able to get through all my jumps today without a micron of pain in my ankles, knees or shins. And I mean the bad pain, not the good burn. If you plan to keep jumping as a major part of your life, get the right shoes.